give me a moment

give me a moment to reminisce, reminisce the time we had ...

from the reckless things we did
the laughter
the fights
the memorable places we went
the left-over you ate
the drive to our fav. coffee place
the movies we watched
the dreams
the consequences of our childishness
......the end......

after a few years lacking of butterflies, goosebumps and sparks, I finally gave out the last teardrops for you .. my first teardrops that fell after a long numbness ..

I never felt more relief,
I finally realized that it's time to let go and move on.

another toilet seat post =P

Can't help not to post an entry today, I need to pour down all my thoughts into words...

Here I am trying to enjoy my last few days here and failing as I'm doing so... Why tho? why?

I just found out that this semester I have to face many tough professors, oh God how am I going to keep an outstanding GPA if that's the case. scholarship seems so far far away -_____-

And another thing, I wanna work! a P/T job as a baby sitter, pet sitter or any slow-paced jobs so that I could study while also working. errrrr I just wanna make extra money, so that I could turn this dream of buying my own Chanel bag to come true.

I wanna move!!! I can't help it, I wanna have my own space! errrr ... I wanna be able to cook anytime I want, able to clean my place anytime I feel like doing it, able to decorate my apt. the way I like it, able to dance around the whole apartment naked ... hmmm O__o

I just feel like blabbering ...

promise, tomorrow will be a happy post!

Confuse

Have you ever felt that you love two or three person at the same time?

Well, that's how I totally feel right now, but scratch the person and change it to places!!

Can't believe my final days in Jakarta are counted ... I feel all confuse again, I love my hometown so much that sometimes I just feel like moving back here again,
My family,
My friends,
My lovely and loyal car,
The street food, ohh .. the food!
The cheap shopping places,
The pirated DVD's,
The life!!

but on the other hand,
I hate the pollution,
I hate the snobby people,
I hate the fact that I can only go to that certain hip spots over and over again.
I hate that I need to deal w/ traffic jam like half of the time I got on a 24hour bases.
I hate the slow internet connection

and sometimes Jakarta is mad boring and all you can do is just sit around and do nothing but gossiping, but sometimes that's just so fun to do right?

but but BUT .. the thing that makes me hard to say goodbye to Indonesia is..
mi amor BALI!
I know, I know, you guys are probably tired of me saying that I'm in love with the place so much that I would give up anything to live my whole life there.

well, I wont give up my last few semesters at FIT for that! but I'm seriously considering BALI as a third stop of my roller coaster life.

Who knows right? maybe I'll find a cute Italian guy who owns a little restaurant in Seminyak, Bali and he'll also speak Bahasa Indonesia mad fluently and yet still able to converse with words in which I might not understand at all but it'll most def. sound mad romantic and maybe he'll be like so rich that he also owns a med-size house with a beach front and coz he's like very family oriented that he's going to provide me a ticket back and forth NY-JKT-BALI 4x a year! or maybe like 6x a year for JKT since my grandparents and my cousins would still be there, but since my parents are going to be in Bali anyway, let's make it 5x a year! that's enough rite?

wait... I must be dreaming way tooo high! I just realized I'm still sitting on my toilet seat when I should be showering mad pronto!

P.S: I'm using too many 'MAD' in this post.. ok! gotta blast!

delaying all obligations

ohmy ohmy! it's been a while since my last blog post. I'm still overwhelmed by the thought of going back home (Indonesia) twice in a year! That's so un-mischa ;P

first of all, happy new year 2010! for those in need of a resolution, get up and do it!! don't just mention it to people and onto a paper and not turning it into a reality!

secondly, I hope you guys are gaining weight all together, hand-by-hand, with me. All I do in Bali was eat and eat. oh don't let me start on that exquisite trip! it'll just make me blubbler! argh. I just can't help it I love that place so much, it's like every time I'm there I can't help not falling in love with it again and again. Each of my trip to Bali has their own theme and each is such an irreplaceable moment. and this I thank my God for the blessing and of course the funds bestowed and transferred to my parents account.

third point, how's everyone with their vacation and the what not? I hope y'll have a great start on this first month of 2010 I really wanna know what you guys are doing..

last but not least, I want to tell y'll something..
the hell with uncertainty dear all... life is full with it anyway, just be "ikhlas" (remain pure and faithful) and do what you want to do - but don't go and sniff crack or smoke weed the whole f-ing second of your life - just let your creative mind flow to your every senses and do something with you life! whether you're facing obstacles or advantages, be grateful with it that something is going on with your life. That your life is not a complete zero sh*t!

kay .. kay .. I'll post some fun stuff over the weekend, have fun dudessss !!